Friday, November 11, 2005
bumming
came home and slept till 1810. mum's wakeup call failed to wake me and i ended up having to rush to driving again. brought b+l along under the delusion that i would actually be in a state of mind to absorb anything i read. managed to finally fix my turning points for all 3 directional change slots. night driving makes me happy :]
after driving went home and soaked in the tub with national geographic and last week's copy of the economist which i feel very guilty for not reading since this week's edition is already out. splashed about a bit and sang and felt like a bimbo for using mum's brand new marks+spencer's bath salts. but they were nice! its good to smell of something besides formalin and rotting flesh. fixed myself a cup of nice warm milky tea and honey and am going to melt away on my nice new beanbag. :]
anatomy practical is summarily unhelpful, because:
1. hepb never follows the practical outline and my moore notes end up being useless.
2. i have the attention span of a goldfish so i lose track of the course of hepb's tortuous splenic artery-like sentences. never know if he's asking a question or stating a fact. no-one else seems to have this problem. hmm.
3. i am short and always end up at the wrong end of the corpse; ie the cut up bits always seem to be facing the person standing directly opposite me. since i'm not tall enough to lean over and get a better angle i'm stuck staring at rotting skin while hepb pontificates at length on various structure ("and this runs here..") and everyone nods and asks penetrating insightful questions. and since most of the time the guys let me stand right in front i feel very bad about squeezing out and in again. and if i happen to be stuck at the back it's impossible to see anything unless i'm right next to the body no matter where i am. kneeling on chairs is slightly better but i can't really bend my knee in airconditioned rooms and so kneeling gets too uncomfortable for me to concentrate after a while.
4. i am always very very lethargic before pract thanks to postprandial slumps, lack of sleep etc.
all this adds up to the fact that i can quite unmotivated for pract and end up bumming around the fringes of the anat group on those brown plastic chairs and daydreaming about all sorts of stupid rubbish. argh. excuses, excuses. next anatomy pract onwards i will stick to bao or mo and copy down all the pearls of wisdom that fall from their lips. ugh what a gross mental image there.
even though he really is quite a crappy teacher i think i'm quite fond of hepb. he's flying off to the us for some anatomy conference so raj is taking us next week.
hepb: ask him mayny mayny kerstchen! not jerrst abahht abdoomen. everything errrlse!
anyway i told him not to get bombed during his trip and he leaned forward in this very conspiratorial manner and told me he was the one carrying the bomb ("errntoo the playne"). so i asked him "for china?" and he just laughed and said he was going to stay 4 blocks away from the white house. haha. i love the man.
feeling nice and melty and very relaxed. unstress is good. :]
come stand a little bit closer breathe in and get a bit higher you'll never know what hit you when i get to you.
just chucked a while load of crap from my cupboard into the dustbin. hooray. i suddenly feel much cleaner mentally. the amount of utter crap i keep in my drawers is amazing and the act of just hurling everything into a big black rubbish bag and tying it all up and flinging it into the dumpster is very satisfying :]
little fishy kisses! :] just fed my tetras and the yellow budgie, which seems to be getting better. she's looking less bedraggled and singing more now, which means it's back to not being able to watch tv in peace because the parrot and 2 budgies have a whole oneupmanship (birdship?) thing going on where they see which one of them bursts my eardrums first whenever they hear the tv being switched on. thank god the canary and zebra doves only sing in the late afternoon. sigh.
+ fictions&fires
11:15 PM
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plangere, latin: to strike, or to lament.
in the depth of winter i finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer.
--albert camus
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to be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best night and day to make you like everybody else means to fight the hardest battle any human being can fight and never stop fighting.
-- ee cummings
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